The word on the street of life has it that if you have 5 of these you are considered successful in this area. But they have to be genuine. Real. The full monte.
I am referring to friends. Yes, ‘They’ say if you acquire 5 good friends in your life time then you can be thought of as a genuine friend too. You see you cannot gather 5 true friends if you are not also a good friend yourself. You must be genuine toward them.
So how do you define ‘True friend’ or friendship? What must we be or do so that we can be that ‘good friend’ and attract and keep faithful friends in our lives? It’s a good question.
I am not sure if there is any official way that you can define friendship. But here is how I define a true friend…the type I am talking about…here’s a couple of sets of questions I use to see if they are true friends. And if I am true friend to them.
Ask yourself: If you turned up at your friend’s house, broke, destitute and in dire need of help, would they open their doors to you? I don’t mean for a couple of hours or overnight-but for as long it takes you to get back on your feet? Would they help you out? Would their home be your home also?
If you know in your hear of hearts that they would-then you have a true friend indeed. (You can also ask them of course, which I have done)
And vice-versa-would you do the same for them? I mean would you really do it?
Be careful though, because what humans say they will do when faced with situations can be totally different to what they actually do in those situations. And that applies to you too!
And here is the other side of the coin that you can ask yourself; Would you still be their friend if (And when) they became ultra successful?
Would they still be yours when you are successful?
Yes surprisingly, a lot of people fail to ask this question of themselves and their friends. I have experienced first hand, so called ‘friends’ who abandoned me when I became ‘successful’. Bitterness, jealousy and perhaps inadequacy on their part, caused them to attack me with all sorts of false and weird and wonderful accusations and then leave my life. I was prepared to be their friend. They obviously weren’t ready to be mine.
Like the saying goes, “You know who you’re friends are when you are on hard times” But it’s not just your hardships that defines people as friends but your successful times too
And me? Well I have three friends who I have been in constant contact with who would do the above for me (And have done). This year we celebrate our 25 years of being truly great friends to each other.
I have a further 3 people who I have known virtually all my life, who I believe would fit my humble philosophy of true friendship. I know without doubt, I would do the same for them.
As I get older, I realise that whoever said, if you have five true friends in your life you are a successful friend, must have been very wise.
Remember, take time out for your friends. Nurture and cultivate good friendship. Be there for them through any hard times they may go through.
And all of their successes.