I think there is a lot of pressure in life on our young people, even more so today. Sure, our parents said to us and probably yours have said it to you too, “You don’t know how lucky you are” or, “It was harder in my day” But I don’t think it is.

So here are 21 life lessons that I hope will help you build a successful, strong and healthy mind. Written by an older guy!

Life Lesson # 1 It Doesn’t Matter About Your Past

Your past does not have to define your future. So if you have had a tough upbringing it doesn’t mean the rest of your life will, or has to, follow the same pattern. Use any negative experiences to your advantage wherever possible or leave them firmly in the past.

You can’t go back and change them and revisiting them often only makes them seem worse than what they were.

Life Lesson # 2 Your Exam Results Do Not Determine Your Future

Whether you did well at school or not; whether you dropped out of university or passed with flying colours, your education will not necessarily find your future success.

There are plenty of talented, intelligent people in graveyards who never used those talents or intelligence for the better. There are also plenty of people who dropped out of school and university who went on to do remarkable things.

Don’t believe the hype teachers dish out that your whole life depends on your academic results. It doesn’t. Attitude and work ethic go a long way.

Life Lesson # 3 It Doesn’t Matter Who is Running Your Country

With so many outraged by Brexit and Trump there is a lot of doom and gloom being spread that this has ‘ruined the younger generations lives’ (Well for at least 5 years in the USA). It hasn’t and it won’t. Life still goes on. People will still be successful and do well.

Life Lesson # 4 Some People aren’t Going to Like You

Not everyone will like you, so accept it. It is purely a numbers game and has nothing to do with you as a person. Some people will love who you are, some will be neutral, some might even despise you. So what? If you change then the people who once liked you might not like you. So there is no point in trying to please everyone.

Life Lesson # 5 Everyone, and I do Mean Everyone, Has Doubts and Fears

We all have doubts and fears spring to mind from time to time, it is only natural as human beings. It is whether you let these doubts and fears force you into a state of inaction. The way to overcome these doubts and fears is through mastery and action.

Life Lesson # 6 You are Capable of More Than You Think

In my 51 years of studying people I have found that too many people seriously underestimate their true potential. If you tapped into your deep pool of inner resources you would surprise yourself, really.

Use them.

Life Lesson # 7 We all Have ‘Bad Days’

Even the most successful people on the planet have ‘bad days’, we all do. Expect them from time to time. Not everything is going to go your way all the time. But just because you have a bad day (Sometimes, some people have a bad week or a bad month) it doesn’t mean you are necessarily ‘depressed’ or have a mental issue.

In most cases, bad times pass away. When a ‘bad time’ lasts longer, they are here to make us stronger and learn vital lessons.

Life Lesson # 8 Create a Compelling Goal

Get a goal for yourself and make it compelling. Dare to dream big and then break that goal into bite sized chunks. Make a video of it in your mind and play it often. This adds joy and purpose to your life. Whether you reach this big goal doesn’t matter. It is who you become in pursuit of it that matters.

Life Lesson # 9 You are a Unique and Extraordinary Person Too

Oh yes you are. I don’t care what you look like, the colour of your skin, your religion, your height, your weight or anything else, you are unique and extraordinary. I have worked in different countries with so many nationalities and I have always found the people unique and extraordinary.

You are no different.

Life Lesson # 10 Ignore Most of What You See on Social Media

You are only seeing highlights and edited versions of peoples lives. They look like everything is perfect and awesome in their life, right? Wrong. They have fears, doubts, problems, challenges and battles to fight too.

Life Lesson # 11 You Don’t Know it All – and That’s Okay

Three of the most unhelpful words you can ever mutter are, I know that. It prevents you from learning something new. I have studied personal development for 30 years but I don’t claim to know it all. And that’s great, it keeps my mind open to wonderful new stuff. I look at myself as a professional amateur.

Life Lesson # 12 Believe in Yourself

Cultivate your personal belief. Fully believe in your abilities to meet your wildest dreams (or your belief that you can learn what you need to succeed). Belief is the foundation to ALL achievement. With it, anything really is possible.

Believing you can or believing you can’t is a choice. believing you can is far less stressful and healthier for you than believing you can’t. Surprisingly, it also takes less effort.

Life Lesson # 13 Be Mindful of Who You Hang Around With

You become who you hang around with. If you want to do something with your life then try to hang around with like-minded people. Stay away from people who don’t have any dreams, goals or ambitions.

One of the hardest, but most beneficial things I ever did in life was leave some of my ‘friends’ when I became ambitious at 27. They didn’t want what I wanted. It changed my whole life and probably stopped me from getting into more serious trouble.

Hang around people who will support you and have common goals. People who will be there when you need a lift through any testing times and there to celebrate your successes.

Life Lesson # 14 Keep Learning and Invest in Yourself

You have unlimited information at your fingertips. use it to your complete advantage. If you want to become a great sales executive, then learn all you can about what makes an outstanding sales executive.

Investing in yourself is the wisest investment you will ever make and it pays the best dividends.

Life Lesson # 15 Make Real Connections

Social media is a great platform and I for one love it. But us human beings crave real connection (All studies show this too) with real people, face to face. In other words we want meaningful relationships. You will never get those on social media alone. Make more time for family and friends.

Life Lesson # 16 Take Responsibility for Your Life

Today there is a trend that nothing is anybody’s fault anymore. “they acted like this because of…” “She did this because of that issue” and so forth.

In NLP we say, You are in control of your mind and your results (Just like I am in charge of my mind and my results). Take responsibility for how your life pans out. In 5 years time you will either have results or excuses. It is your choice.

If you miss your goals, you can’t blame your government, the economy, your parents, your genes, your partners or anything else.

Taking personal responsibility for your outcomes is invigorating.

Life Lesson 17 Invest in Your Personal Development

Ensure your self-esteem and self-worth are healthy. Work on your confidence, resilience (A dying trait now) and everything else that will keep your mind healthy, strong and successful. Everything begins with the mind; your mind.

Life Lesson # 18 You aren’t that Important to Other People

I hate to burst your bubble but other people are not continually thinking about you. They have their own issues and problems in life to worry about.

How often have you thought of other people? Do they know you are thinking about them? No, right. It’s the same with you. If you let the perceived opinions of others bother you, then you won’t get very far. But trust me, you really aren’t that important for other people to be thinking about you all day.

Life Lesson # 19 You Don’t Have Do What You Love…Yet

I just don’t know what I want to do! No, not everybody does at an early age. There is no need to put undue pressure on yourself. Your 20’s are really your experimental years. Try different things and many things to discover what you love to do. It will come in time.

I didn’t discover my true passion until my late 40’s. That didn’t mean I wasn’t successful or enthusiastic about what I did before because I was on both counts. But what I did lead me nicely into what I do now. And you won’t know that if you don’t try different things.

Life Lesson # 20 You Have Greatness Within You

Yes that means you! You have real greatness within you that is craving get unleashed. There is something you can do that nobody else can do like you. You weren’t born to ‘fail’ or live a life of misery. You have God-given talents.

Life Lesson # 21 Be Enthusiastic about Life and Work

It doesn’t matter what you are doing now, be enthusiastic about life and your work. There are plenty of others moaning and groaning their way through life. The world needs more enthusiastic people now. Be one of them. A light that shines brightly.

The world loves enthusiastic people and the universe has a unique way of rewarding them.

Some further reading related to this post should you wish to come back and read more.

3 Powerful Affirmations that Can Change Your Life

Why You Need to be Full of Belief

The Perils of Social Media

5 Quick and Easy Tips to Love Your Job (Any Job)